I’d like to scream at this blank canvas – The Double Life of Veronique movie review

Roger Ebert gave this film 4 stars out of 4 stars.

When I discovered this, I stopped agreeing with Roger Ebert.

The Double Life of Veronique is one of the worst films I’ve seen in my entire life and I’m not exaggerating.

This is where I’d say “The Double Life of Veronique follows yadi yadi yadi yah…” however since this film was so endlessly boring, I forgot what it was about. Literally all I remember about it is the fact that it is boring.

It’s directed by Krzysztof Kieślowski, a name synonymous with overrated, and according to IMDb, it follows “Two parallel stories about identical women; one living in Poland, the other in France. They don’t know each other, but their lives are nevertheless profoundly connected.”

Ok, so apparently this film was about two different Veronicas. Both as interesting as a cardboard square. Not a box… a square.

doube-life-of-veronique9

I have a genuine theory that every single critic had their popcorn secretly mixed with LSD because they seemed to have loved it.

Am I going to tell you specific bad qualities about Veronique? I can only remember one. THERE’S NOTHING. It’s like a blank canvas.

Even when I see a bad film like The 5th Wave, I can still say “at least the beginning was pretty good” or when I see something like Dirty Grandpa, I can still say “there were a couple of laughs”.

But with The Double Life of Veronique, I’d say “at least………” and then you’d need to call an ambulance because I’ll just be staring into space as my mind traverses the great nothing, looking for a way to finish the sentence.

Kieslowski managed to make 98 minutes feel like 98 hours which I guess could be considered an achievement, an achievement among the ranks of “Dirtiest Public Urinal” and “Loudest Crying Baby on an Airplane”.

the_double_life_of_veronique_9

Surprisingly enough, this review is the nicest I can give to this film.

If you haven’t seen this gem of cinema yet, don’t. It’s an hour and a half you’ll never get back. You’re better off watching any recent Adam Sandler film. Yes, that includes Jack and Jill.

Watch Jack and Jill instead of The Double Life of Veronique.

Jack and Jill actually had a story.

What did you think of The Double Life of Veronique? Did you like it? Would you like to talk about it? It’s okay, you can cry. I don’t mind.

Whatever your thoughts, leave your comment below, sign up to this blog on the side and don’t forget to follow my Instagram page for foreign versions of movie posters.

(I won’t put a trailer here. I refuse.)

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s