Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children (2016) – movie review

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Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children follows Jake, a young boy who grew up hearing many tales and legends from his grandfather about an island which was home to a very special house. This house belongs to one Miss Peregrine, a woman with the ability to transform into a bird, who spends her days looking after a group of peculiar children with “abilities”.

A group of Slenderman-like monsters wish to devour these children’s eyes to reverse an experiment gone wrong but they are invisible to the children, but Jake can see them. So it is up to Jake to save the day by… seeing the monsters? Sounds intense?

Excuse me for a moment while I quickly bring up the definition for the word ‘fantasy’…

fantasy: imagination, especially when extravagant and unrestrained

-Dictionary.com

Right. So if the fantasy genre is supposedly “unrestrained”, then how come this film does everything so by-the-book that it seems like the opposite of fantasy… what’s that word again? I want to say realism but there’s a character who projects films out of his eyeball. Somehow this film managed to pull the fantasy out of a kid with motion-picture retinas.

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I wouldn’t say that there is anything particularly bad perse about this film (other than the fact that it is so predictable and generic) but if I had to find a word, it would be ‘inconsequential’. This film doesn’t have anything to give except perhaps some entertainment for really young kids and I emphasize the words ‘really young’ because it takes a child’s imagination to find any kind of fun in this.

Every aspect in this film either isn’t present or gives up during.

For example, I cannot remember anything about the main character or any of the characters for that matter except for the grandfather. I cannot remember the villain’s motivation. I cannot remember a moment in the film I was actually engaged. But I also cannot remember a moment when I was negative about the picture.

This applies to the aspects other than writing as well. I cannot remember a good performance but I also cannot remember a bad one. I couldn’t recall any great direction but I don’t remember disliking it either.

Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children is very inconsequential in that you will walk in not knowing much and leave remembering almost nothing. You should really only pay to see this if you have are accompanying an eager child.

What did you think of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children? What’s your favourite or least favourite Tim Burton film? Are you an eager child?

Leave your comment at the top and don’t forget to follow my Instagram page for foreign versions of movie posters.

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